Piano Sketch

She had given her hand to so many others, to serve as their guide. He was the only one to whom she gave her hand so that he might lead. But she had been dead for a month now…

I listened through the apartment wall. What kind of friend was I? Mikhail played the piano, just like she taught him, and said his lines, unable to bring himself to sing them. I only “understood” any of it because I recognized the original piece, but her adaptation into her own language sounded a decent fit to its happy tone.

“To chat.”
[“To chant.”]
“Perchance…?”
[“To dance?”]

He had never sounded better than when she sang with him, despite her gruff voice. Maybe he never sounded good until she came along. The silence she used to fill with her part seemed as heavy as his gloomy words. Finally, I had enough of letting him torture himself.

The music loudened, as the score commanded, but his fingers stumbled over the keys. Perhaps he was choking on the words now, I couldn’t hear them at this point. But just before I reached his door, I recognized the line he should’ve said:

With every beat of my heart/
I beg you, please, stay with me.

When I knocked on his door, the piano’s lid closed much too conspicuously. His footsteps have been notably heavier these days. The door cracked open, making what little I could see of his face all the more unsettling.

“I must be … being too loud,” he apologized.

“No, I should be sorry,” I offered; “I should be helping you, but I’m not.” Having no idea how to heal his hurt left me feeling even guiltier. “Why are you playing that one, anyway? Don’t you remember, they couldn’t be together because she left him.”

“That’s why. She didn’t want to, but she’s left me, too. Their story’s become mine. If I finish theirs, maybe I can get over this one.”

I was at a loss again. That old movie my grandfather squirreled away for us wouldn’t be enough for this problem. If Marian were here, maybe she’d know what to do. But —confound it all!— if she were here, we wouldn’t need her to fix this!

Desmond, why did you shoot the shepherdess?